First Trimester Survival Guide: Coping with First Trimester Symptoms + Emotions

I've just wrapped up my third first trimester. You'd think after doing this two other times that I'd be prepared for what was to come, but you'd be wrong. It's amazing how quickly we moms forget the pain and exhaustion of the first trimester of pregnancy.

This particular first trimester was excruciatingly painful in that I was also injured and wearing an aircast on my foot for the entirety of it (fell down some stairs outside, all is well now - but like, literally, up until week 13 I was wearing this boot). Due to this injury, I had to be off my foot most of the day. So, even when I had a small burst of energy and no nausea (not common), I was still trapped on the couch.

I say all this to say that I have been through the ringer and now I feel compelled to speak about it - because my energy started to come back, my foot is healing, and I am on the mend emotionally from that torturous time. If you too are having a really rough first trimester, I offer you hope. This is for you!

But why is it so hard??

The first trimester comes with physical and emotional ailments that hit you like a ton of bricks, including but not limited to:

• extreme nausea

• fatigue (unlike anything you've ever experienced)

• food aversions (like, you can't even look at or smell certain things)

• brain fog

• serious anxiety

• ups and downs that will rock not only you but your whole household. We're talking going from extreme happiness to bawling your eyes out in 0.5 seconds flat and back again just as fast.

The first trimester blues are so real.

It's not in your head - your body is doing so much work. But you'll hear from well-meaning people, "You are growing a whole human. Give yourself grace!" and unfortunately, that doesn't do anything for a pregnant woman who feels unproductive and useless. It's perfectly okay to grieve that temporary loss of identity and/or control. It's also okay to not love every second of being pregnant.

When you do have your baby, all of this will feel like a tiny blip of time - but for now you've got a long road ahead of you and it's hard. After having been through this three times, I wanted to share the tips and tricks that have helped me get through this season of life.

How to Survive the First Trimester

1. Rest more than you think you should: chances are your idea of "enough rest" comes from a version of you that isn't pregnant. Take that number, multiply it by 2, and add 3 more hours. You need all the rest you can get. This is just not the time to have a long to-do list. Your to-do list should really only have three things:

   1. form placenta

   2. try to eat when you can

   3. sleep a lot

2. Set boundaries: you’ll likely have some incredibly supportive and loving people around you—but there may also be others who expect more from you than you’re physically able to give right now. If there were ever a time to practice setting clear boundaries, this is it. That might look like saying no to events you would normally attend, volunteering yourself less, or simply acknowledging your limits. Sometimes, it may even sound like, “I’m not able to take that on right now—someone else will need to step in.”

3. Practice gratitude: I know it can feel so cringey hearing that gratitude can help a physically and emotionally struggling pregnant woman. I wouldn't tell you to do this unless it truly helped me out in my serious times of need. Try to think of your rest time as space for reflection. Use it to realize the beauty in your life, even in this current season. I was able to shift my mindset when things got dark; the gratitude was sometimes the only thing that kept me going.

4. When people ask how you're feeling, tell them: this one can be hard for people pleasers. It's easy to say "I'm fine" when you absolutely are not. I had a friend visiting from out of town and I was so worried about the state of my house. Because I had let her know that I had completely slipped in taking care of my environment, she lovingly offered to help me clean up. Sometimes you have to admit it when you need help. The first step is letting people in!

5. Don't stress about what you're eating: if you can eat, great. If you can't, try your best to get in what few calories your body will allow. Some women lose weight in the first trimester due to morning sickness and end up having very healthy pregnancies. Don't put pressure on yourself to eat a salad if it makes you want to ralph. For the last two months, I have really only been able to eat Cheez-Its without feeling nauseous. Do take your prenatal vitamins, and your baby will have what it needs during this time.

Mindset Shifts That Can Help the First Trimester Blues

• This is so temporary: Most women get their energy and appetites back once they hit about 15 weeks pregnant. Some unlucky ones have to wait a bit longer, but there is an end date. Try to focus on the fact that you will feel it wain eventually.

• "I'm allowed to rest": giving yourself permission is so powerful. Sometimes we are holding ourselves back from getting the rest we need.

• You don't have to enjoy this part to still be grateful: going back to what I said about gratitude, it really is that powerful. You can look around and see so much magic and joy in life and simultaneously not enjoy this particular part. I mean, that is truly what life is about. The duality of the good and bad- and realizing the beautiful picture the puzzle pieces make.

Of course, if you are really struggling mentally, please reach out to a healthcare provider. Friends and family can help but sometimes you need more help than what they can offer. Everyone handles pregnancy differently and every pregnancy is different, so it's okay to need support.

I encourage you to remember that this too shall pass and have faith in that. The second trimester is known as the "honeymoon phase" of pregnancy because your first trimester symptoms are generally alleviated at that point and you begin having the energy to do the fun stuff: thinking about the nursery, building your registry if you're going to have one, and planning for the future with your little bundle of joy. I'm here for you!

If you’re craving a slower, more peaceful rhythm during this season, my A Week of Intentional Living guide walks you through a simple 7-day reset to help you feel more calm and in control—one small step at a time. I designed this with motherhood in mind, and found it to be a valuable tool in resetting my home and life after getting my energy back in the second trimester.